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Josette, a french lady, lived in Japan for decades, so not really french, but anyway an amazing kind resident of Siem Reap, saving cat lives, made a visit today. Ragnar, our kitten, is sick since weeks, suffering, drooling his lungs out, a walking skeleton. The diagnose first was feline virus, which is sort of the HIV for cats. Sentenced to be put to sleep, soon or someday. But after the last days taking care of him and the kind visit of Josette and her kind aid and love, I have my doubts this HIV thing. Tests in Siem Reap are not available of course. Heatlh care sucks for everyone, equally, except for the race of the rich – sometimes I love to be a racist. In 3 days I fly to Japan to embrace my love, to be introduced to her parents, to discover Tokyo and to metal my balls, hell yeah! And I can, my quiet conscience rests in typhoon now. Josette will take care of Ragnar, my cute little grand fellow. The evening of this sunday I had dinner with my khmer family. Long time ago we managed a get-together, but only reminding we should do this more often again. This week was a stressful mess on many kind of levels, most emotionally as Ragnar turned into a zombie. And I stupidly miss my girl. But I met Gigi again, whom was with us on the trip to Areng. With her Ajathom with his funky bunch, a khmer rapper, who is one of most lovely rappers I ever met and I haven´t met a lot, which is rare in Cambodia anyway. He is promoting himself with Cambodian flagged merchandise, with pieces of the national hymn on it. He says this makes him proud to be Cambodian. Cambodian has no identity, a lost history and culture and a big fat leech sucking on its resources, so patriotism might has to be differently discussed than in lots of other countries, but I watch this with suspicion. Political changes, and their will be one soon, are more a threat for society than the scars it already has suffered. – I am happy to be reconnected to Cambodia by sharing my life with Cambodia and not with my work, my clients, partners and spare foreigners I cosnider as friends and not a wrong reason to rise glasses. There is an old fresh odour in my head slowly winding up. I WANT THIS TORNADO! I doubt heavily the concept of the metal bar I am involved. It´s not even a metal bar anymore. It´s a theme bar, a pirate bar, where people get pissed, literally. I don´t want to end up like most of the foreigners here doing business. Staying isolated from khmer social life, except the housekeeper, she deserves a smile a week. And suck on the big fat leech´s cock, because we all have to survive. Then, my dear idiot, survive not in a Cambodia. Survive in your home country. Oh, life is more expensive there? Workers? Rents? Taxes? And life is less relaxed? I think you need a toxic clyster to get you on the move, ha? I don´t want to end up like this. I rather… no, I don´t want to think about this as well. I need to think about how to make IT happen here. Back into the first steps I made here. Back to the answer of, “Why I want to settle down here?” Not to make people drunk, listen to their hangover stories on the next shift. Not to design promotion diarrhoea, wrapping shit in golden leaves and on top running after money. This was now a cute personal experiment, as soon as we are back from Germany, I want to answer a new question, “How can IT make a difference?”